membership group rules

THIS IS AN ADULT 18+ MEMBERSHIP GROUP.

If you are not 18 or older, please leave.

THIS IS A GROUP FOR MEN WHO HAVE SEX WITH MEN.

This is an MSM space (men who have sex with men). This also includes trans folks. I'm not trying to police gender identities but for now we're sticking with an MSM focus.

Sexual orientation and relationship status are not considered.
Race/ethnicity/class are not factors, ever.

TLDR RULES:

• No smoking, no drugs, no exceptions

• No weapons

• No photography/videos

• No latex condoms

• No oil- or silicone-based lube

• Be clean

• Be respectful

• Understand consent

• Understand event etiquette

• Do not share user/attendee information

NO SMOKING OR DRUGS, NO EXCEPTIONS

• please do not attend if you smell like cigarette smoke

• please do not attend if you use hard drugs. Please select another party if you're a meth user.

• please do not attend if you're intoxicated on drugs or alcohol

• ok, a minor exception - we don't care if you wanna smoke some weed before attending, but if you appear intoxicated, you may be denied entry

• orgy nights will allow vaping outdoors at the check-in tent

The Basics:

NO POPPERS INSIDE

These make many people extremely sick, including the host. If you use poppers you might just shut down the whole event for the night. Don't be that guy.

NO CONDOMS/LATEX - due to allergies and sex preferences, this event space is latex condom free

• gloryhole nights are bareback only. We can't check the type of condom you're bringing; no condoms allowed.

• you may bring non-latex condoms to orgy nights. They must be clearly identifiable as non-latex to be permitted past check-in

• Latex clothing/gear is sexy and allowed. Get verbal consent before touching others with your latex gear.

BE CLEAN

• a minor amount of sweat/musk is appreciated by many, but if you smell like a locker room, shower before these group events

• clean your dick - cut or uncut, a quick rinse can do wonders

• clean your ass - even if you're just getting sucked off, you'd be surprised how easy it is to detect a funky ass when sucking dick. It's not cute.

NO PHONES OR PHOTOGRAPHY will be allowed at events, no exceptions

• do not take your phone out at gloryhole events, no exceptions. Leave it in your pocket or car.

• during orgy events, phones may be left with your checked clothing. Security of checked items is not guaranteed - we keep an eye on it, but will not replace/reimburse for lost/stolen items. Leave valuables at home or in the car if you're not comfortable with leaving them at check-in.

Consent:

Consent is required at all times before touching another person.
Consent may be revoked at any time for any reason.

At a sex party, the process for obtaining consent varies, and is just as often non-verbal as verbal, but can still remain straightforward:

• Use your words - if you're face to face, just ask. "May I touch you?" or "Can I suck your cock?"

• Gesture - make eye contact and gesture towards their dick, wait for a response before touching

• Start slow - if a bottom is ass-up (blindfolded or not), start by touching their hip, then place your dick against their butt or hole and wait at least a few seconds before plunging in.

If you're brushed away at any point during your approach, back off and move on. It might be fine to try again later but be respectful - if you've gotten a "no" a couple of times, find other guys to play with.

If someone is not respecting your consent, ask the next closest person for help. We are all reading these rules and agreeing to help anyone who asks. Just say "can you help me with consent?" Then get the attention of event organizer/staff. We'll help resolve the situation.

If you see someone not respecting consent, first ask if anyone needs help, then get the attention of event organizer/staff. You might have missed a non-verbal consent cue so asking if someone needs help is a great way to check. We can keep everyone feeling safe and welcome.

Understand that darkrooms are spaces where a degree of consent is waived

If you walk into a pitch-black or very dark room where people are having sex, you waive a degree of consent. Of course you still always have the ability to deny consent; if someone touches you in a darkroom, you can gently brush them off or move their hand away. But realize that anonymous groping, touching, and sex is a desirable feature of these spaces. If it turns out this isn't for you, leave the space. As you're feeling your way around, respect that being brushed off means no and move on.

KNOW PARTY ETIQUETTE
Different event types have differing etiquette. What does that mean? Here are the basics:

Gloryhole Etiquette

• have fun and be nice!

• yes, you can get naked!

• yes, you can wear a jockstrap, underwear, a harness, or other light fetish gear

• respect others and ask before touching!

• NO you can't bottom or suck unless you've arranged and been invited to join the guys behind the wall ahead of time

• yes, it's cool to JO or show off while you wait your turn

  • if you only plan on watching, this is not the event for you. PARTICIPANTS ONLY

• step on up! Let us suck that dick, hard or soft! Keep the holes busy! You made it, don't be shy 🖤

• please take interactions with other participants elsewhere. The goal is for cocks to be serviced by the guy(s) behind the walls

  • no, it's not cool to fuck other guys who aren't behind the walls

• not all lubes taste good... lube is provided and great to use if we are going to suck you

• NO OIL OR SILICONE LUBES ALLOWED - they're terrible to clean up and degrade our rubber padding

• please don't fuck or piss in the yard because that's the stuff that gets neighbors' attention. Urinal provided

• respect neighborly outdoor noise levels - let's not give the neighbors anything to complain about!

ON BOTTOMING...

• the only bottoms allowed at gloryhole nights are arranged ahead of time and are working behind the walls, no exceptions

• IF YOU HAVE HAD DIARRHEA IN THE LAST 2 WEEKS YOU MAY NOT BOTTOM or let someone play with your ass. Drug-resistant Shigella is a big deal right now (also, stay out of hot tubs and pools pls)

• if you have been accepted as a bottom at a gloryhole night, or plan to bottom at an orgy event, you need to clean out beforehand. Touch-ups at the event will be doable, but if you can't clean out beforehand or it isn't taking, then respectfully bow out and try again another time. You're always welcome to do side/top stuff if bottoming didn't work out this time.

• see #tips-and-faq in discord for tips on how to clean out if you're not familiar with what works for you

• why is this important?

  • scat is not desirable at group events or allowed in our venue - we need to keep things clean for everyone

  • there will be lots of ass-to-mouth and ass-to-ass happening, let's keep it clean

DON'T ASK, DON'T TELL...

OK, pardon the reference, but seriously, keep it on the DL. Asking about other participants is not courteous. We will not reveal who's on the invite list. Do not reveal who is a member of the discord server or overall group publicly. This is our unspoken agreement of complicity and anonymity. We're here to have sex, everyone else is too, so we're all in the same boat. If you recognize someone on the street, don't call them out. If you had a great time, feel free to talk about the event and invite other people. Don't mention specifics about who you may have seen attend or who is a member of the group or discord server.

Gloryhole events may have the guys behind the wall listed with username and/or photos - ONLY if consent has been given to do so. Do not share or post any photos outside our server unless published by swap/MEAT as promotional material through social media, etc. If photos are not provided, don't ask for them. If photos are provided, don't ask for more.

Free events may be posted on sniffies or other sites - and these sites may have various ways of showing the invite lists to events. You're always welcome to DM @DaddyNik if you want to attend but not show on invite lists. Paid events will not be advertised on these sites as it violates their TOC.

Gloryhole events are generally open to any sober guy with a clean cock - so bring buddies with you. Do not share the event address with guys you don't personally know, just refer them to contact swap/MEAT directly.

Orgy nights are ticketed invite-only events. Some nights are smaller groups of around 20-30, some are upwards of 100 guys. The date/time/address are provided when you purchase a ticket. Do not share the event address online or with non-ticketed folks.

IT IS OK TO SHARE AND POST ABOUT YOUR OWN PARTICIPATION.

You have the ability to consent to sharing your own information. So feel free to talk and post about attending an event. This isn't fight club, you can talk about it, but keep what you do share about you.

OTHER BASICS...

NO INTENTIONAL POO, BLOOD, OR VOMIT

These things do occasionally happen during gay sex. At our events they are not a desirable type of play. If any of these do happen, please STOP and ask an event organizer/staff to help clean up.

FIRST AID

First Aid (untrained) is available at check-in for bandages for minor booboos. If a bigger accident or emergency occurs, we'll seek help from the medical professionals at 911.

WATERSPORTS

• gloryhole events do not support watersports. There is a urinal in the breezeway - you wanna watch, that's cool. You wanna drink form the tap and not make any mess, that's cool. Don't get any piss anywhere except in your mouth or the urnial.

• orgy events unfortunately do not have goo watersports facilities. Piss play is OK in the showers. Please respect if someone asks to use the toilet and asks for privacy. If you use the shower - for piss or getting clean - clean up the water on the floor or ask event organizers/staff to help clean up the excess water.

• DO NOT get piss all over a bathroom or any other space.

• DO NOT engage in piss play outside - we'd like to prevent mud and having piss dripped and tracked throughout the event space. Also, not everyone is turned on by WS and they may not want to smell piss or touch your wet body.

BDSM

• we support kink and bdsm!! Not all members are comfortable around kink; please keep most kink in the basement dungeon space.

• take impact play and restraints to the dungeon room. A friendly smack on the ass of a consenting bottom is fine just about anywhere - but if you're going to engage in bondage or impact play, please head to the dungeon room in the basement.

• no toys, restraints, locks, ropes, or other BDSM items will be provided. Bring your own. See #tips-and-faq in discord for "What Can I Bring?"

• EXPLICIT VERBAL CONSENT IS REQUIRED FOR BDSM. Anyone is welcome in the dungeon room, any bottom is free to jump in the sling. This does not mean you consent to bondage or impact play.

RESPECT:

Respectful interaction is required by everyone at all times. This applies online and in-person. Abusive language or behaviors will not be tolerated.

• if there is a dispute online, involve a mod or @DaddyNik

• if there is a dispute in-person, get the attention of party organizers/staff

• this is not specifically a BDSM group, do not engage in power dynamics without consent

• we are establishing that general pejoratives like "cocksucker," "faggot/fag," "gay," "cumdump," etc. are intended in a sex-positive and upbeat affirming manner. DO NOT use these terms in an abusive way. DO NOT continue to use them if asked to stop.

We can all expect to hold each other to the high standard of accepting, observing, and modeling these rules at all times - whether during online chat, in-person events, or private communications. Failure to strictly observe and abide by these rules may result in a temporary or permanent removal or ban from a channel, this server, an event, or all of the above. We are all consenting adults and as such, minor unintentional violations may be discussed and resolved by those involved.

Intentional violation of rules will not be tolerated.

Gangbang Etiquette

• have fun and be nice!

• yes, you can get naked!

• yes, you can wear a jockstrap, underwear, a harness, or other light fetish gear

• respect others and ask before touching!

• NO you can't bottom or suck unless you've arranged to be the featured cumdump

• yes, it's cool to JO or show off while you wait your turn

  • if you only plan on watching, this is not the event for you. PARTICIPANTS ONLY

• step on up! Let that boy suck that dick, hard or soft! Keep the cumdump busy! You made it, don't be shy 🖤

• please take interactions with other participants elsewhere. The goal is for cocks to be serviced by the guy(s) cumdump

  • no, it's not cool to fuck other guys who aren't the featured cumdump

• not all lubes taste good... lube is provided and great to use if you're getting oral

• NO OIL OR SILICONE LUBES ALLOWED - they're terrible to clean up and degrade our rubber padding

• please don't fuck or piss in the yard because that's the stuff that gets neighbors' attention. Urinal provided

• respect neighborly outdoor noise levels - let's not give the neighbors anything to complain about!

Orgy Etiquette

• have fun and be nice!

• yes, getting naked is required!

• yes, you can wear a jockstrap, underwear, a harness, or other light fetish gear

  • gear is allowed, but keep it "mostly naked" unless at a specifically fetish-gear themed party

• respect others and ask before touching!

• yes, it's cool to JO or show off while looking around

  • if you only plan on watching, sign up to be a volunteer

• lube is provided (we love SPUNK LUBE HYBRID)

• NO OIL OR SILICONE LUBES ALLOWED - they're terrible to clean up and degrade our rubber padding

• nudity and sex outdoors is permitted within screened/tented areas only

• respect neighborly outdoor noise levels - let's not give the neighbors anything to complain about!

• respect the chill zone - the back porch and, when provided, the outdoor fireside lounge area are great places to kick back and take a break from sex and cruising